Life with Jack, the Mullhund.

Yesterday, I spent most of the day cleaning.  We have our next summer guest flying in tomorrow and I wanted to tidy the house up a bit.  I mopped all of the floors, changed all the linen, and dusted.  I even bought a new scented thingie for the bathroom.

The house was clean and fresh.

This morning, Dirk got up before the chickens and took Jack for his morning walk adventure.  Dirk opened the kitchen door open so that Jack could get to his water.  Then, Dirk came back to bed.  Usually, Jack will take a little nap, and then wake us up for breakfast.

That is not what happened this morning.  Dirk left the kitchen door open when he came back from the dog walk.  Usually we keep it shut unless everyone is awake.  This morning only Jack was awake, and that is a dangerous thing.

It seems that he didn’t want to disturb our sleep, and decided to get breakfast for himself.  He was unable to get his dog food bag open, so he had the next best thing.  The nasty, moldy bag of compost that was sitting on the kitchen table.

I woke up and found Jack sleeping in his doggie bed in the living room.  The bed was surrounded by crushed egg shells and flower petals.  Like someone was trying to be romantic, but failed miserably.  Jack’s tummy made a terrible sound.

I followed the trail of nasty to the kitchen to find part of a watermelon, egg shells, rotting flowers, veggie bits and something very slimy sprinkled all over my previously clean kitchen floor.  The dog followed me in and looked at me like “Why did you let me do this??”  His tummy rumbled again.

Now, we had finally got to a point where Jack wasn’t farting like a grown man anymore.  We were able to control his very sensitive tummy with a different dog food.  Also, we never give him people food…ever!

It seems, garbage does not sit well in Jack’s tummy.  He is farting again.  We have also needed to make several trips outside to relieve his unhappy bowels.  WE LIVE UP 4 DAMN FLIGHTS OF STAIRS!!

I have had to mop the kitchen, again.  I am hoping that Jack’s tummy trouble resolves quickly as my fat ass can’t run up and down the stairs not one more time today! I am also hoping that he has not developed a taste for trash.  Although, I have started calling him Müllhund or trash dog.

So, on that note.  I am expecting my NC friend, Suzie to arrive tomorrow.  We haven’t seen each other in almost 8 years!! As of right now, my apartment is again clean.  However, I do have a very farty dog.


Anyone else have a crazy dog that adds both humor and disasters to your life?  I would love to hear your stories!



32 thoughts on “Life with Jack, the Mullhund.

  1. I’ve had a lot of huskies and they are the funniest dogs in the world. At the moment I have a dobie/lab mix who’s very serious and a giant breed livestock guardian dog (Akbash) who’s hilarious in her own way — mostly she likes to sleep in spaces that would fit a toy poodle. Thank god neither of them eats trash. 🙂 I love your dog. Please give him a big hug from me.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh no! That can actually be dangerous. I hope things haven’t gotten worse since you published this. Our vet says eating compost is the leading cause of death among dogs, in her work. This, when we brought our Sasha in from same. Hope we get a follow up.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Omg. Gurrrrrrrrl I feel you! We had a black lab who could NOT resist our neighbors compost pile. Including the one time it was full of rancid lobster. Poor pup was up all night puking. Awful, awful, awful. I’m glad Jack is on the mend and I’m sending big hugs your way!!! Time for a glass of wine perhaps?!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh dear! I hope he’s fine!! I don’t have dogs, but my cats like going into the thrash too, sometimes. Have to keep a sharp eye on them and make sure the kitchen door remains closed at all times!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I had a cat who loved to do similar things, we have a sieve in the sink to catch any leftovers when rinsing plates and if we don’t empty them fast enough he would take whatever is in there and eat or just spread around the kitchen. Yuck.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Jack is gorgeous, farty or not!! I have a Bouvier, and this is a breed known for its “excessive flatulence.” When we brought her home I thought, “Surely that doesn’t apply to every Bouvier.” But my dog can clear a room faster than almost anything else. I hope your boy feels better!

    Liked by 1 person

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